Thursday, July 3, 2008


For the past week I’ve been piecing together the Apolo Ohno article that will be A&Us August cover story, which will be distributed at the annual international AIDS conference being held in Mexico City this year.

During my limited social interactions over the past several weeks I’ve encountered yet more individuals who have come down with the "FI Disease." I guess we’ve all been infected to some extent. I call it the "Fear of Intimacy Disease." We all seem to yearn for intimacy with another, but when we get it, we run away. Whether it’d be with a friend, family, or fan [a lover, partner, etc.]. Of course, I am NOT talking about sex! Intimacy is the act of bearing one’s heart and soul with another. It means being vulnerable, which can be very attractive. However, it can be scary, as well. Because when we're intimate with another, we're intimate with us. That means getting a good look at ourselves, both positively and negatively. Others become a mirror for us. Confrontation time, Baby. Granted, all this ain’t easy!

It helps to be intimate with ourselves FIRST before we become intimate with another.

Being intimate is certainly a developed skill. It sure would have been great if we were taught this in high school, along with other life issues like learning how to balance a checkbook and how to deal with death. Why doesn’t education prepare an individual more for REAL life?!


Wilmaryad Ben O'Scallas said...

That is a nice way of exposing the matter, dear sir. You used hauntingly simple words to describe a state of openness with oneself that most, if not all, of us dread getting in touch with.

Intimacy starts with " I " after all, doesn't it? :-)

Kenny Ray said...

Great post, great food for thought. I have to wonder if advances in digital communications have actually moved society backwards in regards to analog intimacy.

Dann said...

Thanks Ben. Thanks, Kenny Ray, and a VERY good question, which I have pondered on many times. Without being too cynical and too biased [!!], my opinion leans toward the side of making us more separate from one another. And maybe it's just my age, however, most of these hi-tech contraptions have created MORE STRESS for moi. Honey, just give me an "on" and "off" button! ;)

coolingstar9 said...

We have to be more intimate ourselves.
Great thought indeed.
Have a nice day.